A well-known entertainer runs into financial difficulties. The IRS is coming for him. If he has an affinity for it, maybe he tries his luck on the open water. So goes the story of Krusty the Clown — though it shares some features with the story of Billy Joel, and we need to talk about them.
The relevant incident in Krusty’s life comes in Season Seven of The Simpsons. In the episode “Bart the Fink,” after Bart (voice of Nancy Cartwright) opens a checking account, he figures out that he can get an autograph from Krusty the Clown (Dan Castellaneta) if he sends Krusty a check and gets it back with Krusty’s endorsement. But Krusty doesn’t sign it: He stamps it to an offshore bank, and, long story short, Krusty turns out to be a massive income tax cheat. When the IRS starts seizing property — even turning Krusty Burger into IRS Burger, complete with tax return-sized forms just to order a meal — Krusty grows despondent, flying his prop plane into the side of a mountain.
Don’t Miss
Dozens of Springfieldianites witness the crash and mourn Krusty. This includes Bart, who is horrified to have driven Krusty to suicide. When Bart thinks he sees Krusty in town, Marge (Julie Kavner) assumes it’s just guilt causing Bart to imagine him. But Lisa (Yeardley Smith) decides to support Bart in finding out the truth. They end up at the docks, where the Sea Captain (Hank Azaria) gives them a tip on a check-kiting buccaneer named Rory B. Bellows.
Though Rory B. Bellows the longshoreman initially puts the kids off with what he claims is “a lot of corroborating evidence,” they quickly identify him as Krusty from his pacemaker scar, third nipple and cow-skull birthmark. They then easily bait him into dropping his alter ego by reminding him how much he still wants to be famous. Rory B. Bellows may not be a real person, but the kids find out that his life “is insured for a surprisingly large amount” just before the boat Krusty’s swum away from blows up in the water. Thus, Krusty’s tax problems are solved, and everyone can start back at square one in the next episode, just the way we like it.
Viewers of HBO’s two-part documentary series Billy Joel: And So It Goes learn, in its second half, that Joel also went through a financial crisis. No, not by lighting cigars with rare comic books or sending flowers to the grave of a woman who’s still alive.
After splitting from his first wife and manager, Elizabeth Weber, Joel handed off his financial affairs to Frank Weber, Elizabeth’s brother. It wasn’t until several years into Joel’s next marriage, to Christie Brinkley, that the couple found out Weber was (allegedly?) spending Joel’s money on real estate and horses and failing to keep Joel current on his taxes. Unlike Krusty, Joel didn’t fake his death: He sued Weber for $90 million; he also released the album Storm Front and went on tour for two years. (This is coming from someone who loves most of the Billy Joel songbook: knowing “We Didn’t Start the Fire” was written to make back $30 million Weber allegedly siphoned out of Joel’s bank accounts makes it a little easier to forgive.)
Still, the parallels force one to notice something: “Rory B. Bellows” and present-day Billy Joel could be brothers. Here’s Krusty in his Rory drag: huge eyes, button nose, goatee.
Here’s Joel: huge eyes, button nose, goatee.
They even have kind of the same taste in boats!
“Bart The Fink” aired in February 1996, the better part of a decade after the news of Joel’s lawsuit was reported. So while it’s not likely that “Rory B. Bellows” was designed with financial fraud victim and maritime enthusiast Billy Joel in mind, it’s possible. Krusty The Clown and Billy Joel are two of our most important show business figures. They have money problems in common. Why not a face?